lexicalunit (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} lexicalunit) wrote,@ 2007-05-17 19:45:00 |
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Fat People are Lazy
Yes, it's true. If you're fat, you are a lazy slob. Don't try and deny it, it is the simple truth.
Today at Smoothie King I waited in line behind a fat couple getting extra large strawberry smoothies while I thought, "you know, you're fat because you drink extra large strawberry smoothies..." to myself. When they finally paid for their treats and left, I quietly waited while the Smoothie King employee (a 30 something red head from Ireland) whipped up my small high protein chocolate workout shake.
After a few minutes the fat man comes hobbling back in and asks me if I'm the owner of the Honda parked out front. "Yes," I reply with a quizzical look on my face.
"You need to move it now, it's too close to our car."
I gave my best Dr. Spock that's illogical raised eyebrow expression as I looked out the window at my car. It was parked between the white lines exactly in the middle. There was half a foot of space to both the left and the right of my car. I looked then at their car, it was the one with the 300 pound hippo next to it. It was also directly in between the white lines. Regardless, I responded in a cordial manner, "I'll be happy to move it just as soon as I get my drink, I'm leaving then anyway. It'll only be a second." As I spoke I gestured toward the Irish lady who was working ever so quickly to create my drink.
The fat man was halfway out the door as I finished my sentence and then he spun around and said sternly, "no! You'll move it now."
Cue ultra super Dr. Spock that's illogical raised eyebrows. "Fine," I say, and start toward the door.
"My girlfriend can't even get in the door you're too close!" the fat man explains as I walk by him.
I stop and look at him directly and say, "that's not my fault." Then I continue on my way out the door. As I get in my car the 300 pound hippo mutters a few words of apology, "don't worry about it," I say as I open my car door.
Then the fat man steps outside and exclaims to the 300 pound hippo, "it's not his fault!" His words dripping with sarcasm.
Fat people reading this post. You are fat by conscious choice. You went out of your way to be fat. You decided knowingly to eat too much and exercise too little. Whatever accommodation people give you for your choice, it is at their discretion and you are to be grateful if they offer any at all. If you don't agree with me on this, it is because you are stupid and wrong. That is all.
Yes, it's true. If you're fat, you are a lazy slob. Don't try and deny it, it is the simple truth.
Today at Smoothie King I waited in line behind a fat couple getting extra large strawberry smoothies while I thought, "you know, you're fat because you drink extra large strawberry smoothies..." to myself. When they finally paid for their treats and left, I quietly waited while the Smoothie King employee (a 30 something red head from Ireland) whipped up my small high protein chocolate workout shake.
After a few minutes the fat man comes hobbling back in and asks me if I'm the owner of the Honda parked out front. "Yes," I reply with a quizzical look on my face.
"You need to move it now, it's too close to our car."
I gave my best Dr. Spock that's illogical raised eyebrow expression as I looked out the window at my car. It was parked between the white lines exactly in the middle. There was half a foot of space to both the left and the right of my car. I looked then at their car, it was the one with the 300 pound hippo next to it. It was also directly in between the white lines. Regardless, I responded in a cordial manner, "I'll be happy to move it just as soon as I get my drink, I'm leaving then anyway. It'll only be a second." As I spoke I gestured toward the Irish lady who was working ever so quickly to create my drink.
The fat man was halfway out the door as I finished my sentence and then he spun around and said sternly, "no! You'll move it now."
Cue ultra super Dr. Spock that's illogical raised eyebrows. "Fine," I say, and start toward the door.
"My girlfriend can't even get in the door you're too close!" the fat man explains as I walk by him.
I stop and look at him directly and say, "that's not my fault." Then I continue on my way out the door. As I get in my car the 300 pound hippo mutters a few words of apology, "don't worry about it," I say as I open my car door.
Then the fat man steps outside and exclaims to the 300 pound hippo, "it's not his fault!" His words dripping with sarcasm.
Fat people reading this post. You are fat by conscious choice. You went out of your way to be fat. You decided knowingly to eat too much and exercise too little. Whatever accommodation people give you for your choice, it is at their discretion and you are to be grateful if they offer any at all. If you don't agree with me on this, it is because you are stupid and wrong. That is all.
